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N.A.S.A
SPACE TECHNOLOGY
THE KODAK LABORATORIES
MODERN SCIENCE
Nobody can explain it.
THE SHROUD OF TURIN
The 2 thousand year old mystery that still baffles the greatest minds of today...
Read the article here...
and you still won't understand how!
And if you're over 16, read the stuff we couldn't print.
The Far Side
A Stroll Through
The World of Spirit
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For everyone who has ever had an evaluation - just remember, it
could have been worse.
These are actual quotes taken from National
government employee performance evaluations:
1. "Since my last report, this employee has reached rock-bottom
and has started to dig."
2. "I would not allow this employee to breed."
3. "This employee is really not so much of a has-been, but more
of a definite won't be."
4. "Works well when under constant supervision and cornered
like a rat in a trap."
5. "When he opens his mouth, it seems that it is only to change
feet."
6. "This young lady has delusions of adequacy."
7. "He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails
to achieve them."
8. "This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot."
9. "This employee should go far, and the sooner he starts the better."
10. "Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold
it all together."
11. "A gross ignoramus - 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus."
12. "He doesn't have ulcers, but he's a carrier."
13. "I would like to go hunting with him sometime."
14. "He's been working with glue too much."
15. "He would argue with a signpost."
16. "He brings a lot of joy whenever he leaves the room."
17. "When his IQ reaches 50, he should sell."
18. "If you see two people talking and one looks bored, he's
the other one."
19. "A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on." 20. "A
prime candidate for natural de-selection."
21. "Donated his brain to science before he was done using it."
22. "Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train
isn't coming."
23. "He's got two brains cells, one is lost and the other is
out looking for it."
24. "If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice
a week."
25. "If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get change."
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26. "If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean." <br>
27. "It's hard to believe he beat out 1,000,000 other sperm." <br>
28. "One neuron short of a synapse." <br>
29. "Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; he only gargled." <br>
30. "Takes him 2 hours to watch 60-minutes." <br>
31. "The wheel is turning, but the hamster is dead.
Michael Jordan having "retired," with $40 million in endorsements, makes $178,100 a day, working or not.
- If he sleeps 7 hours a night, he makes $52,000 every night while visions of sugarplums dance in his head.
- If he goes to see a movie, it'll cost him $7.00, but he'll make $18,550 while he's there.
- If he decides to have a 5-minute egg, he'll make $618 while boiling it.
- He makes $7,415/hour more than minimum wage.
- If he wanted to save up for a new Acura NSX ($90,000) it would take him a whole 12 hours.
- If someone were to hand him his salary and endorsement money, they would have to do it at the rate of $200 every second.
- He'll probably pay around $200 for a nice round of golf, but will be reimbursed $33,390 for that round.
- He'll make about $19.60 while watching the 100-meter dash in the Olympics, and about $15,600 during the Boston Marathon.
- This year, he'll make more than twice as much as all U.S. past presidents for all of their terms combined.
Amazing isn't it?
However... If Jordan saves 100% of his income for the next 500 years, he'll still have less than Bill Gates has at this very moment.
Game over. Nerd wins.
**********
Be alert...the world needs more lerts...Anonymous
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